The Evil Step Monster

cruellaDo the words Evil Step Monster conjur up imagines in your mind of Cruelle Deville and send shutters up your spine while covering the rest of your body in cold goose bumps??

Fear Not 🙂

I coined the phrase Evil Step Monster (ESM) in honour of my dad’s second wife, the one who is not my biological Mother, when I first became a Step Daughter….aka Daughter of the First Marriage or DOFM for short.

 Yes, I have experienced both sides of this female only Step relationship, have lived to tell about it and have a ton of fun stories to share. Over the past 15 years I have navigated Step Daughter- hood and just over seven years ago moved into a situation of my own that saw me take on the title of Step Mom, Evil or Otherwise 😉

In all seriousness… my ESM was a Gem! No complaints due to a fabulous history of love, support, understanding and friendship. Heck, we even went to see the Rolling Stones together 🙂

4 responses to this post.

  1. Posted by DOFM on April 27, 2010 at 2:58 pm

    You, my dear, are an exception to the rule. Be grateful and stop gloating. Divorce is rarely a positive to any child (young or grown). And this is not simply my, or one person’s opinion, it is a well studied fact.


    • And thank goodness there are exceptions to every rule!!
      I think there are a few of us children of divorce out here that would agree, studies aside, adult or otherwise, that our lives are better for seeing our parents in successful second relationships or happily single and living their lives on their own terms.
      It shows us that we can prosper post divorce and celebrate that which the original marriage brought to this world….like us children.
      Divorce will not go away, we can’t change that. However, we can change our reaction to it and we owe it to children everwhere to rejig our own thinking to pave the way to better understanding.
      Thanks for stopping by!! It’s is always a pleasure to welcome different thought processes and opinions.
      LA 🙂


  2. Posted by IL on May 6, 2011 at 9:36 am

    I don’t think you are really an exception to the rule, I have had a step-mother since I was about 2 years old, I am not 33. I have NEVER had bad feelings toward my step-mom. In fact I hate the term “step-mom” she’s my mom!

    My child now 14 also has another mother (step-mom) and she too is great!!! She respects my role as mom and I respect her role as mom. My child, like me has 2 sets of parents and they all four love her. I found this website while looking for a nice poem or something to send to my daughters other mother for mothers day but while looking online all I find is a bunch of negativity towards the step-parent. I consider myself lucky to have another woman in my daughters life who loves her like I do.


    • Glad to hear there are others out there who have had good-great Step experiences. I agree with you regarding the term Step Mom, even Step Family doesn’t sit well with me. A friend of mine uses the terms Bonus Mom and Bonus Daughter and that works for the two of them.
      It had been hard to find positive resources for Step Moms and families as there are more negative ones. The tide does seem to be changing though, with women who are looking at their situaitons with compassion and even humour…imagine that 🙂 I had a tough time finding positive resources I likes years back when all this started for me, but am happy with the turn of attitude we are now seeing.
      Be happy in your family and be eternally grateful for the experience you’ve had.
      And, Happy Mother’s Day!!
      PJ xoxo


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