Ban Money Guilt

This is a tough one… Money can cause major challenges in original families, so add in the need to support two households on two salaries, and things can get a little tense…to say the least!

Finally, this year, we have gotten to the place where child support is starting to diminish. A long in coming event from my perspective, as my husband’s oldest graduated University last year, has been working full-time ever since, has gotten engaged, has bought a house, and is getting married in two weeks 🙂 Somehow, continuing to pay her Mother to support her has seemed just a tad excessive.

Here’s why I feels I have a say in the matter… my salary has contributed more to the general expenses of our home and life than my husband’s over the years even though he makes about $30,000 per year more than I do, and I have now taken a stand to regain some of the financial footing lost over this time frame. At first, I did feel guilty. Guilty about being focused on money, but the fact of the matter is, love aside, money is the currency of survival in the society in which we abide.

I whole heartedly threw my resources into the common pot for the greater good when we commenced this journey together, and in hind sight, great old reliable hind sight, it was a move I should not have made. I’ve left myself compromised on the financial front, with a dwindling window of opportunity to reach  comfortable status once again as retirement for my husband looms but 4 short years away.

At a point where I had expected us to be well poised for this next phase of our lives, we are in essence starting fresh and saving money like newly weds now that we have a few extra bucks to set aside for ourselves. And so I have taken more control over the situation, maybe to make up for the lack of control forced upon me by the divorce agreement, and I am doing my gosh darn best not to feel guilty about it at all!!!

I am keeping in my mind, each and every day, that my future, financially and otherwise is just as worthy of care and attention as the well-being of the children my husband came to this marriage with.

I have, I can admit now, too often over the years not believed this, and I suppose am now making up for lost time and lost self-care 🙂 And I’m not being all that quiet about it either lol!!

So, go away Guilt, I deserve this! I deserve to reclaim my life and my finances! I deserve to take care of myself first!

Chaching 😉

PJ xoxoxoxo

3 responses to this post.

  1. […] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Laura Allard, Laura Allard. Laura Allard said: It's a beautiful morning for a #StepMom post. #BanMoneyGuilt Happy Saturday Lovelies!! xoxo […]


  2. Glad to hear I’m not alone!


    • Not alone, never alone… you can pretty much bet that whatever you have going on, there’ll be someone out in Step Mom-land who has been there, done that and gotten the t-shirt!
      Thanks for the visit, stop in again 🙂
      LA xo


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